Response to "Mountain Blood" by Cary Bayless

"Mountain Blood" is a story about Chad Grune and his ability to fight the past. The story revolves around a faint memory involving his college sweetheart. As the story proceeds, we find out that she was murdered and Chad saw the body. Naturally, he felt responsible and has subjected himself to a world of pain because of it. This part of the story is told through memories, but takes place in present day. 

I really enjoyed the use of Beau. I thought using him as the motivation for telling the story was a strong move and added a nice dimension to the character. I would have like to see a little more background on him, but overall he was a strong part of the story.

The characters are really good. As I stated above, I think Beau is a very strong character. Also, your description of the police were good. I found Chad a little too repressed at times, but he was believable for the most part.

I thought the dialogue between Beau and Chad was good. It seemed pretty realistic. Being right out of college, would they still talk like this or a bit more adult?

I think your story flows very well and I never had a problem figuring out what was happening.

The setting is understood to be in the mountains, more specifically in and around a cabin.

The opening does a good job of setting up the story. I would personally like more detail on the cabin. I would also like a little more inner conflict while walking back to the cabin.

The closing is logical, but could someone really forget or move past that? I understand you're trying to relay the message of hope, but you should show us instead of say it.